Sunday, May 13, 2012

Nordstrom at Arden Fair Mall in Sacramento

Who is the King of Nordstrom at Arden Fair Mall in Sacramento?  It's me. AKA the Exalted One (formerly Old Butthairs). I have a very top secret hideout there that you will never, ever find, even using bloodhounds. Incidentally, I'm also the true King of France and Holland and the inventor of 25kt gold. You can read more about me at but don't go there yet.

True King of France and Holland and the King of Nordstrom store in Arden Fair Mall, Sacramento, CA
If you are among the favored few, I may give you some Godiva Chocolates (My subjects are insanely nutty for Godiva. The put high fructose syrup in at least some of it, you wouldn't think they'd put that crap in there but they do. Shame. Правда короля Франции и Голландии, и король Nordstrom магазин в Arden Fair Mall, Sacramento, CA
Если вы находитесь среди немногих избранных, я могу дать вам несколько конфет Godiva (Мой предметы безумно вкусный для Godiva. Положить высокий сироп, по крайней мере некоторые из них, вы не думаете, что они бы сказал, что дерьмо там они dobut. Позор

Contains High Fructose Corn Syrup
Mostly, when I'm at Arden Fair and not lurking in my secret hideout, I'm trying to spot secret agents of The Church of Bad! They're all over the place, like rats and not nice rats at that (the rat generally is a noble beast).  When I spot someone from The Church of Bad, I chase them around with a Q-Tip dipped in brown mustard, that neutralizes them pretty darn good and installs motivation for a career change on their brain.

The other best way to deal with agents of the Church of Bad is to sneak up and sprinkle them with pubic hair. That always freaks them out! Pubic hairs are in short supply around here.

Below: Ellen with giant smoke ring clip, very cool! (was here)

Get it today!

Cool items only available at my ZAZZLE STORE

 OK, I'm back, had to take my best of show (before I got her) pug dog: Chuckawookapookatookawakatakatoo, out for a walk. You can just call her Mia. She, of course, is a raw meat dog. I won't even mention the other pug, guy gets on my nerves, everyday clawing me for raw meat with his tiger like claws. 

Chuckawookapookatookawakatakatoo the famous champion pug dog. Don't get her mad, she will turn into something like the ghost black dog of Peel Castle on the Isle of Mann.
 Chuckawookapookatookawakatakatoo der berühmte Meister Mops Hund. Lassen Sie sich nicht sie verrückt, sie wird zu etwas wie der Geist schwarzer Hund von Peel Castle auf der Isle of Mann verwandeln.

Below: 2 ft smoke ring generator, shooting smoke rings at trees and kid

My lovely Star Vase. Subjects puts cool stuff in it for their beloved King and I usually thank them by rubbing their buttocks. If not rubbing their buttocks, I have my personal valet use the ingenious "Hamann Butt Lift" on them which is very popular. The valet grabs the butt, lifts it, taking up most of it's weight, and floats the person around the room.  Utterly relaxing!!

Got stuff to do, back latter. King Farrell (@farrellhamann on twitter, YouTube channel: farrellhamann
Кэти Перри "ню" бабочка костюм! (Katy Perry's "nude" butterfly costume, a must see!)
ペリーの "ヌード"蝶の衣装をケイティ!

I made my subjects stare at this picture of the huge dude holding the super-huge olive. I don't know why. I'm the King so I don't have to have a reason. The subjects got restless after 3 hours so I fined them all 30 brass washers, our monetary unit.  

Please note: if you see a wiener dog in every piece of toast, you may have wienerdogitis. There are two main causes: 1 is listening to idiot Ed Crane on Crane's Corner in KFBK propaganda radio, Sacramento, the other cause is over use of high fructose corn syrup. (which can make you 
 Here's Ed Crane of KFBK shit radio

 America's hottest dude
 Amerikas heißeste Kerl
미국의 멋진 남자
মার্কিন হটেস্ট লোক
 Amerikas heißeste Kerl
 Ameryki najgorętszym facetem
 Le plus chaud de l'Amérique gars
 الرجل الأكثر سخونة في أميركا

The Roseville Galleria is wealthier than Arden Fair Mall but the girls are much, much cuter at Arden Fair Mall.  Just wanted to let you know.  

 Market Square is a little mall stuck on the East end of Arden Fair. I'm going to tell you about that but first have to do some research. Don't use the restrooms in the basement.... ever and don't send a kid down there without a switchblade knife.  This is no joke.

Note: shirt tucked into underwear for photographic purposes only. Wearing my best pair of boxers!!  No need to explain the sidearm, I hope.

 Gold plated potato chip that Rush Limbaughzbub's housekeeper shook out of his pants. Limbaugh is a member of the Church of Bad so I have to keep an eye on him. The sad fact is that Rush Limbaugh (Limbaughzbub is actually a turd eating alien from the planet Crap. 

 Above is the Royal Drink of the King of Nordstrom's at Arden Fair Mall. (Can't buy this anywhere) 

My study in the Royal Palace
This is the Bieber section
Above: Rare Justin Bieber pic. (From his secret album: "Eat me, I'm a Twink!"
 Вверху: Редкие Джастин Бибер рис. (Из его тайну альбома: "Съешь меня, я красавчик!"

Main staple in the Justin Bieber diet, little pink and white mГлавный продукт в рационе Джастин Бибер, розовый и белый зефир и закуски сырые куриные желудки.arshmallow snacks and raw chicken gizzards. 
 Hauptnahrungsmittel in der Justin Bieber Ernährung, wenig rosa und weiße Marshmallows Snacks und rohem Hühnerfleisch Muskelmagen.
 জাস্টিন Bieber খাওয়াদাওয়া, কম গোলাপী এবং সাদা marshmallow খাবার এবং কাঁচা মুরগীর gizzards প্রধান প্রধানতম.

Ah, tasty raw gizzards just the way Bieber loves em!

Токсичные убийцы робота ошибки из космического пространства
Problemas assassino tóxicos robô do Espaço Sideral
Toxiques Bugs robot tueur from Outer Space
GiТftige Killer Robot Bugs fra verdensrommet
 Toksyczne Bugs Robot zabójcy z kosmosu
  Bugs toxice Killer Robot din spaţiul cosmic
 विषाक्त बाह्य अंतरिक्ष से खूनी रोबोट कीड़े
 외계에서 온 독성 킬러 로봇 버그
 Toksiskas Killer Robotu Bugs no kosmosa
 Bugs Robot Pembunuh toksik dari Angkasa Lepas
 Bugs robot Tocsaineach Killer ón Spás Amuigh
 বিষাক্ত মহাকাশ থেকে ইসলাম রোবট বাগ
 Eitrað Killer Robot Bugs úr geimnum
 Tóxicos errores del robot asesino desde el espacio

سمية البق الروبوت القاتل من الفضاء الخارجي

 Heh, gold is not a problem.... just a tad of my secret horde of gold nuggets from my little hideaway in the Sierra Nevada. Don't try following me, I don't use a trail and I just might double back behind you and roll a boulder down on your head.  This is gold of very high purity, Leprechaun grade.  The Mercury dime and the Indian head nickel are for scale.  I got me a whole pot of these and there is plenty more for the grabbing.  

Heh, ist Gold kein Problem .... nur ein bisschen von meinem Geheimnis Horde von Gold-Nuggets aus meinem kleinen Versteck in der Sierra Nevada. Versuchen Sie nicht, mir zu folgen, weiß ich nicht verwenden, eine Spur, und ich könnte einfach verdoppeln Rücken hinter sich und rollen einen Stein nach unten auf den Kopf. Das ist Gold von sehr hoher Reinheit, Leprechaun Klasse. Die Mercury Dime und das indische Kopf Nickel sind für die Skala. Ich habe mir eine ganze Kanne davon und es gibt viel mehr für das Grabbing

 Хех, золото это не проблема .... чуть-чуть моего тайного орда золотых самородков от моего маленького убежища в горах Сьерра-Невада. Не пытайтесь за мной, я не использую след, и я как раз может удвоиться позади вас и катить камень вниз головой. Это золото очень высокой чистоты, Лепрекон класса.Центов Меркурия и индийский никель головы для масштаба. Я меня весь банк данных, и есть еще много для захвата.

Forums: Worse car you have ever owned, worse boat you're ever owned. Mainly a boat site.

 Cell Phone Tower
(I've got to watch it here because if I say any more, they will try to have me killed. I wouldn't die easy, heh heh, I'm prepared, I'm like the thing in the movie Alien "You don't dare kill it!" It is said that the Army Corp of Engineers works on these and way too much juice goes into them and the cell antenna are too long. Haarp? Death frequency? See the bird on the very top. That's no bird, that's a drone! The drone on the cell tower knows the bird below, I've been watching them and recording their every move... Secret: If you get real close and are wearing a copper ring, Justin Bieber's cell phone calls will transmit directly into your brain!

See? Here's proof right here of the cell tower plot!  Damn bird started pulling out my hair! I'd hate to have those talons wrapped around my throat. 

 Setting up in my large metal shed. 

By appointment: 916-641-7696 Want to see people from Marin County and Granite Bay also.
Bring the kids and dog. OK to smoke your cigar! 

Flush away Grover Norquist and his infernal no new taxes pledge

The Great Blue Frog as Art Critic

The Great Blue Frog and his Boiled Cabbage

The Great Blue Frog and the Snake 

1 comment:

  1. Chuckawookapookatookawakatakatoo the famous champion pug dog is awesome!